This has been on my heart for some time. I’ve felt the nudge from the Lord repeatedly, but shrunk back in fear like I tend to do when I’m called into the unknown. I’m in a season of suffering and I know the Lord wants to use it. But I, like so many, feel my “loaves and fishes” just won’t be enough to feed many. Yet, the Lord still calls me and continues to give me the desire. I am in a season of chronic illness. I have Dysautonomia. It’s a fancy word for feeling sick so much. My autonomic nervous system is damaged and it affects every part of me. I’m sick all the time in one form or another. It causes many symptoms in my body such as overwhelming fatigue (not your normal run of the mill tiredness-more like you’ve run a marathon carrying an elephant), dizziness and vertigo; my dizziness is almost always constant at varying degrees, nausea frequently, pain-I also have peripheral neuropathy along with the Dysautonomia, anxiety and panic, sound intolerance, heat intolerance, near syncope (passing out), light-headedness almost always, migraines, I can’t stand for long, I can’t do anything for long-cleaning, cooking, walking, depression, tinnitus and much more. My days are difficult to say the least. I will share more on that in a later blog.

But for now I want to use my loaves and fishes of encouragement, help, tips, love, and understanding to meet as many emotional needs in the body of Christ that I can. And I’m going to trust the Lord to multiply it. I want to strengthen my brothers that their strength may not fail. Suffering has taught me compassion for others hurting, whether suffering mental, physical, emotional pain. I truly believe that the world will know who Jesus is by our love for one another in the body of Christ. Human nature is selfishness and greed and inward focus, but when we in the body of Christ see each other hurting and bear their burdens with them, it shows Jesus’ compassion and love. My next posts will be longer and more subject focused, but for tonight, I’ve gotten my feet wet. There is more to come and I pray you will be encouraged as you read. God bless you my family.


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